And at that moment, at that exact moment I realized I had made the biggest mistake of my life. And I could not take it back I couldn’t not undo it
The thoughts became more spread out, but with that they became more clear more thought out. No longer just statements but plans and precautions, whole days mapped out. They were killing me, they’re only getting worse, more and more do I lose sleep to the thoughts of never aching again. Never having to bear the brunt of this world, filled with problems and tribulations. These thoughts, I don’t know how long I can outrun them.
These suicidal thoughts hit me hard..
You’re just a boy…so grow up and be a man
Mama they try and break me
The window burns to light the way back home
A light that warms no matter where they’ve goneThey’re off to find the hero of the day
But what if they should fall by someone’s wicked wayStill the window burns
Time so slowly turns
And someone there is sighing
Keepers of the flames
Can you feel your names?
Can’t you hear your baby’s crying?
Mama they try and break me
Still they try and break meS’cuse me while I tend to how I feel
These things return to me that still seem realNow deservingly this easy chair
But the rocking stopped by wheels of despairDon’t want your aid
But the fist I’ve made
For years, can’t hold or feel
No I’m not all me
So please excuse me
While I tend to how I feelBut now the dreams and waking screams
That everlast the night
So build a wall
Behind it crawl
And hide until it’s light
Can’t you hear your baby’s crying now?Still the window burns
Time so slowly turns
And someone there is sighing
Keepers of the flames
Can’t you feel your names?
Can’t you hear your baby’s crying?But now the dreams and waking screams
That everlast the night
So build a wall
Behind it crawl
And hide until it’s light
Can’t you hear your baby’s crying now?Mama they try and break me
Mama they try and break me
Mama they try and break me
Mama they try
Mama they try hey!
Mama they try and break me
Mama they try and break me
Mama they try and break me
Mama they try
Mama they try
“Momma they try and break me…
All of them try and break me…
All of them try and break me..”
And they’re winning…
My house is giving me this cold embrace…feels like everything in life is doing the same..
(via s4fety)
(via s4fety)
No one to talk to…crying..need you right now..
Why am I such a sad..pathetic..boring person…
Why is it that I fear every Christmas..it brings me no happiness, everything is so shallow, I don’t look forward to people putting on fake smiles to pass the time only to return to their problematic lives mere days later..it’s all a ruse, I don’t look forward to Christmas, probably never will…at least not for a long time..
